30 Days of Hypnosis

I lost my battle to stay up all night this morning about four am. I barely made it into the countdown before I was gone. I had really strange and disturbing dreams for the  second night in a row. I am starting to think that maybe Katie was on to something when she wondered if the hypnosis might cause odd dreams. The one night before last was a goofy ‘my girlfriend got into an argument and I woke up angry until I realized how stupid that was’ and the one this morning involved a seeing a friend I haven’t seen in years and him not knowing me. It wasn’t a nightmare so much as it was really bothersome. The friend in question is a former training partner I had in karate. He joined the military prior to the war in Iraq and no one that I know has seen him since. My other former training partner killed himself four years ago so I have been worried about Josh for years now.   I think the dream had less to do with him and more to do with me feeling as if I have turned my back on things that have been important to me.

Of course the dream stuff is neither here nor there, I just think it is interesting that Katie and I have both had some interesting dream experiences. It makes me wonder if in unlocking a door way through to the subconscious if that doorway works both ways. That is just supposition on my part but it would make sense if we were letting things past security to get in that some other things might slip out without us knowing it. Or it might just be that I ate a burrito too soon before going to bed.

I slept for six hour and woke up around 10:30. I tried going back to sleep but nothing, not even the countdown, helped so I got up and started my day. I was distressed initially but really six hours is not so bad. Truth be told, six hours is a good night’s sleep for me. If I do ever manage to sort out 10 or 12 it is usually because I have done something physically exhausting or I’ve been bitten by a tsetse fly.  So six hours is a success at the end of the day. Or during the day in my case.

I am not sure how things will turn out tomorrow but my schedule will be changing slightly on Tuesday. I am going in to work later and getting off later. It doesn’t seem like it should matter but I now have the same schedule as I did when I had the overnight shift at Alltel. This gives me even more hope since I never had a problem sleeping on that shift. I would assume there were other causal factors involved there but at that time I was fairly miserable. I was in a terrible marriage in a house with no air conditioning and the plumbing in the bathroom was out the majority of the summer. It really sucked. It was hot, the chihuahua barked and people were really rude on the phone. There was really no upside at all. Now I know some people sleep a lot when they are miserable but I am not one of those people. I am a dweller. If I get depressed I have a hard time sleeping. Of course, when I am super happy and excited I have a hard time sleeping.My point is that things are just peachy in my life right now so I think that if I can sleep with a preponderance of crap in my life I should be able to do it when there are good things.

I think the trick with the later shift is that I don’t freak out quite so much about having to get to sleep early so I don’t worry about waking up too late. Two hours isn’t that big of a deal really and it is the same amount of time but something goes on in my head where I feel like if I stay up an hour or something and then go to bed that is okay. Thinking about this now I feel like I am a bit neurotic. Now that I have health insurance I might look in to seeing someone about that. For now though, I am good with six hours.